Wednesday, February 14, 2007

'Will you be my Valentine?' said the Spider to the Fly

I don’t have anything against pick-up lines – they are smart, innovative and above all provide great source of immense entertainment, especially on a day like Valentine’s.
While women dream about their gifts – red roses, candlelight dinners, perfumes, John Abraham(?) and all other assorted paraphernalia, the men are busy trying to invent excuses – the TV, Radio and posters galore (not to mention the Shiv Sena) would not let them use ‘forgetfulness’, which until recently was the well-tried-and-tested-requiring-no-racking-of-brains excuse.

Can someone please tell the Shiv Sena the factual figures (no puns!) about how Valentine’s Day contributes to increasing the national GDP by exactly 16.78% (ok, that was my wild imagination, but what the heck!) - from cell phone networks where lovey-dovey messages jostle for space to restaurants and pubs which are overbooked with men and women who have finally found the mantra to overcome their coy selves.
Not to forget the innumerable number of heart-shaped-balloons fluttering away at every street corner and the florists taking up the daunting challenge of supplying those flowers to the love-struck people as also the sale of cards on this ‘Hallmark Holiday’.

But gentlemen, if you think that Valentine’s day is passé think again, when was the last time you approached ‘that’ girl without getting into any bodily harm? Well Valentine’s Day provides the perfect opportunity to do so.
When provided with that one opportunity in the year to earn maximum brownie points in her little pink notebook, why let go of it?
And of course you can make a beeline for all those single women and shower them with compliments in the vain hope that it would be appreciated with something more than a ‘thank you’.
For those guys who are still skeptical –there are some ‘n’ number of dating sites masquerading as networking sites, which especially appeals to our Indian sensibilities (don’t we love camouflaging anything remotely amorous) where you can copy-paste movie dialogues to women who are Ashiwarya Rai look-alikes (going by the pictures in their albums).
So rather than thinking about it as an obligatory performance of an outdated duty, all you people must treat this as a fun-activity very much like how you would go about your annual appraisal at work.

While I plan to hang around with my group of friends dressed in our invisible cloaks (which the Potter kid has kindly lent me) in my favorite pub, you go ahead and book that table in your restaurant of choice else you'd be forced to watch the special episode of KBC at home! –Don’t say I didn’t warn you.